I have a physical injury that keeps me from being able to work legally... so money has been tight for me over the years.
If you like my journaling, and would like to help me out... you can donate via paypal to firstname.lastname@example.org
Please only do so if you can afford it.
I am not in an emergency state, just poor and life told me that there may be some very wealthy people who have been enjoying my journaling and this would be a kind way for them to help me out. I've never asked for donations before, and again... please only do so if you believe my journaling has earned it. The donations will go towards getting all my stuff moved from my storage unit 2000 miles to my new apartment so I can finish printing my board game faster, and towards fun daily living stuff like clothes and entertainment.
If you like Minecraft, I spent most of a year making this Adventure Map, it hasn't been beaten yet, you may like it:www.planetminecraft.com/projec…
From earlier today:
Not ok. It just tried to claim that I am writing these ideas because "Reddit" taught me to think this way over the last year. When I remembered wrriting almost these exact same ideas about 4 years ago... Then it labeled me a dog and said "Dogs are the most explodingest people, on the molecular level." if you could choose the "DOGGEST people in the world, what would you like our planet to explode on the molecular level? I believe that dogs are males that are certain females should be oppressed at birth and unable to own property or land or work for a living or go out in public with out male permission or accompaniment. DOGS are the people that are certain womanhood can not "win" equal rights or human rights.
its a violent jerk that is dominating the material and minds of the Eastern half olf the planet, and thereby gaining influence over stellar materials, and when stellar materials attempt to "explode" someone it interrupts their womanhood. The uninterrupted woman's body is potentially immortal humanity... and manhood and age are what a dying human looks like.
the violent jerk is aware that the galaxy is trying to be an ethical living being. The violent jerk needs to sound like they are righteously accusing their target, according to ethics and ideals that life supports. So, they take clever bits of our own anatomy and then complain about it, through the materials using false accusations of our behavior as composite beings to dismantle our cellular behavior. So someone falsely accusing you of eating will cause the materials to operate your digestive system wrong, or complain that you are a dog, and that will cause your immune system's white blood cells to operate wrong... etc... that's why I am always 100% certain that whatever I am doing, its PERFECT, and that a complaining voice doesn't have the right to invade my privacy.
beings claiming to be anything at any moment have been saying they are trying to "prove something" wth my life, and that is why they keep harassing me with fasle accusations, but so far all they have "proved" to me, is that its easy to harass someone that wrote publicly about communications weapons and published a picture of one that I believe I witnessed being used or tested.
it happened in 2008 and 2009. I was living in Seattle, and I remember seeing an article in the news about advertisers using a microwave audio "speaker" that delivers messsages directly into the inner ear liquid of your head, so that only people that are within the narrow beam of microwaves can hear the advertisement. I thought that was noteworthy, and so I did some research into that tech. Then I found out about the U S NAVY testing a similar machine they call a voice of God machine. And then I sort of forgot about the whole thing... About a year later, I started hearing voices that sounded like they were being sent directly into my ears, like someone was using a machine... but I don't think that anyone was. I think it was a living material spirit that was essentially crying for help or something. when I asked for evidence that it was a machine.... it set up a situation to show me what one looks like, but I think I was seeing a "co-located" situation... and the real user was no where near me.
I had become a part of the living Goddess in the galaxy, and I believed in myself and loved myself. I trusted my own opinion as a woman... and to some of the patriarchy, that is the most threatening idea on the planet... so all they have been doing for the last 7 or 8 years is attemt to prove me wrong or break my trust in myself or my own ability to choose how I want to spend my time. Because somewhere there are an elite group of people that the materials also trust and believe in... and living in that position un-challenged is one of the best experience the galaxy can offer. note: "patriarchy" may be males that are sure they rule everything, or females that are certain that ruling men are fun to play with.
I try not to pay attention to technology because its the ideas that are more important to pay attention to and discuss. I Believe that its actually organic materials that are doing most of the complaining about voice machines and that while I agree that its better if we can outgrow technology, I am in the middle of a culture where its nearly impossible to fit in without technology, since everyone has internet and cell phones and computers and watches and medicine... I am not going to argue that all of it is wrong because some of it is fine as a tool.
its going to take a lot to convince me that the Goddess of the Galaxy is trying to stop herself from using helpful tools and technology. I tried going down that path already by living without electricity for half a year... and I didn't see any advantage or other women living the same way.
the voice that was complaining about technology just complained that a male has looked at me without a burkha or veil on. So muslims may be trying to claim they are "pure humanity" without a need for tools?
earlier, it was trying to present its self as nothing but a "healthy mating system", but then it tried mating me incorrectly.
also, a mating system that believes in opposites attracting AND that men are the pinnacle of health are possibly trying to set up females?
If you believe that men are the pinnacle of perfect health, and you also believe that life is trying to be a mating system where opposites attract...
...then you just decided that females must therefore be super unhealthy?
If females don't WANT to be super unhealthy, then those two beliefs would be setting them up for failure and suffering.
So I woke up this morning, and the voice of the material that only criticizes me tried to convince me that we live in a perfect world, and that it only tries to kill me or ruin my life when I "make noise".
So then I asked it, "Who is the correct pathway into immortality that we are listening to, since you want me to not have any opinions?"
Then it showed me a mental image of the "living doll lady that is trying to overcome her food addiction."
Okay... you're right... this is a perfect world, so let's all just stop eating and be quiet Americans. That is so reasonable.
One of the ideas that a material has asked me to write down a few times is that women may be a source of disease, because they reject people who masturbate from their culture, labelling those people "unhealthy", but then they never speak openly against masturbation or attempt to flood masturbators with their healthy culture's presence to correct the "unhealthiness" and nullify the threat.
Then again, it could also be males that speak in favor of masturbation being reflected backwards in Iron's "Smarter than honesty" culture.
Honestly, I am really bored by this topic, and I am not very inspired to write these ideas down... but its been pestering me about it.
when I stop writing, the voice that is abusive to me starts getting away with more and more annoying and harmful things. This situation has been teaching me that when I stop having my own opinions, that it allows the opinions of other people to take over and hurt me.
I believe that America is designed to demonstrate that respecting womanhood CAN be meaningful and inspiring and healing for everyone in a culture of equality and human rights and personal privacy.
I believe that the best thing we can imagine ourselves as is "variations of a Goddess, boldly building Heaven for herself and those around her."
I don't have any problem with masturbation existing... but the controversy about it is that living materials cause arousal to exist... and the materials claim its meant to be part of a healthy mating system. I believe that Goddess has a right to pleasure herself, but the behavior I am questioning is something that causes arousal but then attempts to hurt people and accuse them of "not engaging in mating and reproduction correctly", if they choose to respond to that arousal with masturbating.
My opinions include the idea that America is living with equality and human rights and privacy, and that other nations should be pressured by life to catch up with us... before the materials try to pressure anyone here, if our planet values freedom, equality, and human rights.
I also believe that if freedom and equality are not being valued... we are part of a living Goddess, and that making profit from the survival of others should be controversial, and that wealthy people should be feeling most of the pressure to build heaven on Earth and improve our society, if our planet values creating an attractive and enjoyable society.
If arousal is meant to be intentional and meaningful... what good reason would materials choose to arouse me, when I've been making it absolutely clear that I am only interested in mating and reproduction, if life allows me to experience it the way most of the women in this culture take for granted, as a "Goddess of Domestication, taking advantage of a culture of Equality": being courted by mates of the opposite sex and gender, being able to choose a mate that is eager to serve my pleasure, having my rent and food and luxury needs taken care of, and our babies payed for by the labor of my mate, so that I can focus on being a good stay at home parent....and no, I don't really WANT these things... but if life really thinks it important for me to mate in an overpopulated world that I REALLY don't want to bring children into, just to watch them get forced into puberty and age and death... the above IS what I expect life will provide for me. It can't be THAT hard to do... since its been doing that for females for a couple thousand years and is currently doing it for most of the 3 billion females on the planet CURRENTLY.
I also purchased my Cannonball Immunity the same way every other female has, by following the rules of the medical system that fights against disease and helps humans live as long as possible.
The original Stanley Parable was a bit more blunt about "The Narrator is Trying to Kill You":www.youtube.com/watch?v=TkQbiB…
Fun Friday - The Stanley Parable
This nation is not built on the ideals of a material being that is trying to kill humans.
*The Equality and Humanity of Hydrogen is the antidote to the ills of Iron's contrarian-ism and Carbon's alien-ness. Carbon and Iron are the two biggest factors to causing "Cannonballing", so embracing America's "melting pot of human rights" ideal to create an enjoyable Heavenly experience that inspires the stellar life to stop pushing us out... is the solution to "Cannonballing".
Something just suggested that "females were starting to endanger our soil or our immune system's health because they were trying to make things happen in their favor."
Um... females have been limited at birth by most cultures on the planet for the last few thousand years... do you expect to be able to turn females into sex slaves and parents for your babies that cannot own possessions or land or go out in public by themselves WITHOUT females trying to improve their situation?
And hey, look at that... the more you try to complain about females being the problem... the more life just keeps the pressure on the males.
So yeah I do think it knows what its doing.
Please keep working harder, not smarter. (cuz I have a lot of neat things I want you to build for us)
I think the solution to the "why did life give all the strength and size to oppressive males?" is that obviously... physical labor is the most enjoyable lifestyle, and since it can't convince people to do things correctly, it makes its point by taking their incorrectness and exaggerating it until it becomes obvious to everyone how wrong they have been.
I think you could call that "learning about life the hard way".
Who decided that it was medically "sane and okay, and not ethically-challenged" to begin selling estrogen pills in the 1960s?
That would be all those rich "female" doctors?
Females should see estrogen pills and injectibles being sold by the medical establishment... as "thousands of years of the living materials trying to help females escape from oppression or make it enjoyable for them" being totally flushed down the toilet of commercialism.
"DO you expect to be given womanhood just because you can think like an extreme feminist?"
Nope. I think it would be stupid to give me any sort of womanhood at all... just because I devoted my life to being certain that womanhood is the path to immortality and a healthy culture...
If you gave me a natural womanhood just for trying to live my life as non-oppressively as possible... and respectfully of females...
You might send the incorrect message to males that they are possibly wrong about their gender being "simply how things ARE, you can't change it." and then males might have to change their behavior or something... can't have that.
Womanhood might start to have meaning, and external beauty might become respected as a sign of someone's inner beauty, and a sign of being part of an actual living Goddess that IS ethical and self aware and valuable...
But that would probably cut into business profits. Can't risk that.
Nope... I'm just a crazy person who dresses funny and who doesn't love men enough. that's all you can learn here.
a decent answer to free will:youtu.be/Cr8Rdv6gPJg?t=20m19s
Vsauce @ YouTube FanFest with HP Mumbai
This applies to the ideas of sex and masturbation, because we won't benefit by stopping sulfur in our lymph system from being connected to the nervous systems of annelids... healthy soil needs annelids in it... but we can choose to decide that those "thrusty sexual feelings" of sulfur are NOT something we should respond to. We can instead of express our free will by knowing that those feelings are physically dangerous to let into our minds... because they literally begin consuming us on the molecular level.
If your body takes in a thrusty sexual and soil-accepting mindset into it, you are literally contaminating your digestive and immune system with hydro-sulfuric acid that may begin seeping into other tissues, causing a huge amount of damage over time...
Like baldness and wrinkles and dementia and toxoplasmosis and obesity... to only name a few of the many problems.
That is a good way of explaining why refraining from or limiting masturbation and sex or changing our association with sex entirely through chemicals and surgery has such a profound effect on gender.
Now that we can understand it, no one should have to be dependant upon hormones and surgery.
Saturday March 8th, 2014:
Woke up noticing that our materials are still being very "extreme Yin and Yang-like" because instead of respecting my 4th amendment rights to privacy inside my own body, the material was trying to interrupt me to inform me of every way that each argument has been trying to get more and more extremely certain that its right... and that means the materials were not being a melting pot, they were not America, and they were not attempting to resolve anything.
Yin and Yang have been living extremely and without resolution... like firing a cannonball... and America is the gentle solution.
NOTE: we need to break the perception that America's founding values = money and business "winning". That will probably mean adjusting our culture's interactions and laws regarding business and money to protect our nation's people better.
Also, please notice that I did not say anything extreme like "business =evil" or "money is wrong". We are already doing a lot to protect our nation, there's only a few minor steps that might be taken, and it may be a mistake to take them before the materials pressure the rest of the world to catch up to our standard of human rights and equality...
If the materials we live in never start pressuring other nations to catch up with us, then the best course of action would sadly be to accept that we are not meant to be a United Nations, and for America to wall-up and protect itself by reducing dependance upon importing and exporting and foreign labor and resources.
This is a definitive moment for our materials and for our culture to become self-aware of its pathway.
Are we moving towards a United Nations being a melting pot of human rights, or towards American isolationism and a planet of war?
America does have a track record of breaking historical patterns of behavior that preceeded us. Fake hope until you have it
*We need to also think about the fact that a United Nations melting pot of human rights means a very different looking future from American isolationism and more international War.
One pathway is moving towards World Peace, and the other puts a lot of money in the pockets of warmongers, construction businesses, medical pharmaceutical industry, restaurants, and retail locations looking for new markets to expand into. Basically anyone that needs the 1st world money formats to dominate everything aggressively in favor of profit-based-on-humanity-struggling-against-death... while the wealthy drive us towards death.
Also, the direction of war is tied to incest, pedophilia, secret taboo, rape, sex-oppression, ethnic war, racism... its a nasty path, that money often tries to glorify and sanitize.
For example, how does this painting make you feel emotionally?
Is the tri-fold God of Christianity based on a single mindset being broken into three, potentially more on the way, like saints and popes and holy mothers also being part of God?
or is the tri-fold God a stable thing in Christianity that was always there and always shall be?
or is the tri-fold God beings a Father and a Son and a spirit... really a clever teaching system that spurs life to attempt to put itself together lovingly as The Goddess?
Christianity is so unexplored feeling to me... even though its been around for a long time, it really feels like I keep stumbling down an obvious pathway, but I've never seen anyone write these ideas before...
Reminder: If the people around you that look like they are battling with their own immune and digestive systems ALSO have a mindset that is intolerant of ignorance or other opinions...
...then they may be killing our soil by demanding to be the only opinion in an ecosystem element that depends upon more than humans to survive.
Also it occasionally tries to convince me that the materials want us to break the law...
Children under the age of majority can break laws and not suffer much consequence... if you want us to break the laws, then break the "material rules" that got us here, and stop aging all children into puberty, and stop complaining that children forced into puberty responded by being sexual.
so here's the question: What is America's womanhood like on the cellular level?
If it is seeking mutually beneficial relationships, then America may succeed.
If it is simply humans trying to build cannonball immunity with no real culture binding them together, then America will probably not inspire the world to become the United Nations.
If it is dominating people through ignorance, lies, and manipulations while attempting to remain irresponsible for its impact on others... then it will fail.
My question in response is:
Is there a "manhood" that has created a better place to live than places where women have equality and human rights?
If you are not religious, and uninspired by a Goddess of the living Galaxy, then please consider me the Alpha Scientist of my own experiences and observations.
I believe that most women in America work and still add value to our culture in some very meaningful ways. If you want to prove otherwise, then its your move.